Thursday, October 28, 2004
headless chick
need to start bidding for courses again. sigh, gonna miss this term's perfect 3day week timetable......
planning timetable = planning future. makes me wonder yet again... where do i wanna go from here? what do i really want?
am still the headless chick i used to be.
~~~ Angela 10:37 PM
Tuesday, October 26, 2004
3min too slow
went to j8 after sch to pick up some groceries for ma. stopped by popular first to get a pair of cheapo scissors for my project. first time shopping for vege n stuff all by myself. it felt rather weird. but sorta enjoyed it.... =) think i really wouldn't mind being a taitai =p - mind u, not a housewife.
grrr.... but was very pek-chek when i left the carpark. $2.20! and i only parked for 1hr3min. sheesh. overshot by 3min n that cost $1.10. so angry w myself. shouldn't have spent such a long time in popular wondering if i should buy that very girlie, very pink n very pretty little twin stars folder which is overpriced at $7.90. sigh.
~~~ Angela 11:45 PM
Monday, October 25, 2004
fat n unfit =(
i'm SO
totally outta shape. could barely run 1km at my normal speed..... sigh, had to reduce the speed, even so, only managed to complete like 2.4km. gee.... now resting in the gym, need to get my breath back b4 i attempt to drive home. so terrible. really need to make it a point to exercise like at least once a week. or else, in a few years time, i probably wont be able to run at all. yikes!
~~~ Angela 6:16 PM
mama's home
mama has returned home. She's better now, still on medication of coz. but she's home! =) n i'm real happie.
thanx for all ur prayers n concerns! =)
~~~ Angela 10:27 AM
Saturday, October 23, 2004
drained
travelling totally drains me out. have been travelling quite abit these couple of days coz everynite hafta visit ma in the hospital. i love to drive. really enjoy the freedom of it, the mobileness. but i guess, u'll feel the strain when u're dead tired n still hafta try to stay alert on the road. trying to keep to the speed limit. sometimes speeding n making sure that the cameras dun get u. n expressways are dangerous coz every stretch looks the same - puts u to slp....
i hate driving when i'm unsure of how to get to a destination. got lost today...... was trying to get to SGH from NTU. took the AYE... but missed the exit to jln bukit merah.... n went all the way to ECP, den PIE to changi. goodness....... got out at tg katong, stoped at some housing estate n scrutinised the map for like 15min.... sigh. to make matters worse, it was pouring. all alone. really wanted to cry. no wonder those amazing race contestants always shout at their partners when their partners cant read the map or tell them where to drive to. damn frustrating. anyway, managed to find my way to SGH by gg back where i came from. but got lost again somewhere in bukit merah n had to stop to read the map again. but wasn't that bad, coz was almost there liao. by the time i reached the hospital, oredi developed a headache.
almost fell aslp during the drive back. yawnz~ at least mama seems to be getting better =) thank God!
came home to a pitch dark house. cold n alone. sighz....... that's y i've always viewed family as more impt than frens.
~~~ Angela 1:18 AM
Thursday, October 21, 2004
sweet voice - a bane or a boon?
CAT prof juz had some sticky key problem with his excel sheet. was asking the class for help. so everyone was giving suggestions, which i personally think, were stupid. i said, "i think u hold down the shift key until something pops up." they laughed. n the prof gave up trying. WHAT??!!!! its true!!!! u go try it on word or excel or ppt or smthg. hold the shift key for 8 seconds, n a box will pop up, then u can change the settings for sticky keys , toggle keys n filter keys.
BLEAHZ!!!! bet u didn't know that rite? (actually i only found out a few days ago when Paul showed me n joyce) hmm..... maybe its my voice. sweet n soft......... (differing opinions?? u're juz deceiving urself. ha!) not forceful n authoritative. so nobody believed me. oh well, its their loss for thinking that i'm some bimbo.
~~~ Angela 2:43 PM
Work in progress
"Our work reflects our character. And being a Christian, my character reflects His work in my life. I’m still a work in progress."
i juz stole those lines from somebody's blog. Not very proud of such an action, but i think those are wise words worth showcasing on my blog too.
~~~ Angela 1:54 PM
Wednesday, October 20, 2004
Mum's sick
ma's been admitted into hospital.
please pray for her...................... =(
~~~ Angela 2:28 PM
Monday, October 18, 2004
Purity is non-existent.
is there such a thing as purity in this God-forsaken world?
Wat defines purity? Are u pure? Am i pure??
sigh, i would like to think so. But seriously, there is no one pure. as it is written in the bible - there is no one righteous. NOT ONE.
that is why we all deserve to be under God's wrath.
i am disturbed. greatly disturbed. can't help but view everyone in a different light now.
ignorance is indeed bliss. i do not wanna know! wanna live under my own little safety blanket. but dunno y, i've been hearing alot of such stuff lately. sexual immorality, to be specific.
Lord, gimme the serentiy to accept the things i cannot change, the courage to change the things i can, and the wisdom to know the difference.
What can i do? What can i change?
Can i accept the things i cannot change? i mean, we're toking about pple's lives n lifestyles here. their sin. Why would i wanna accept their behaviour when i know it is wrong?! should i desensitize myself? try to detach myself from the rest of the world?
i do not wanna accept this dreadful reality. can't come to terms with it, esp when i know its not juz the pple on tv, its pple in my life, ard me.......
sighz, that's y i've always wished i never grew up. always wished that i can be 5 forever.
the world needs Jesus. but even when we have Him, many a time we forget n fail Him all the same.
~~~ Angela 1:45 PM
Friday, October 15, 2004
wanna be in solitude.
I WANNA GO HOME. like, right now.
feeling so so so blue n down n sad. since like last nite. (n it izzant even pms). didn't think my ma will notice, but was wrong. "how come ur eyes like swollen today?" sighz.......... din even wanna wear my tigger shirt to try to make myself happier.
juz had CAT mtg, am supposed to haf MPW mtg, TT training, n MNC mtg later...... but well... postponing MPW, n not turning up for the rest. seriously in no mood to face pple. even if i do, i wont be of much constructive help either, so wat's the point rite??...... right temple quite pain oso............ sigh.
feeling so zombified. juz like that time when i juz broke up w calvin n still hafta go sch everyday. still hafta face everybody all the time. oh well, little can be worse than those times.
need to concentrate on other things. like the total change in concept for our CAT proj, my MPW proj that i've not done enough research on, FA presentation nxt week n i've got no clue wat's gg on, Mktg quiz, CAT assignment, TWC report, FA hw. okie, actually that's it. not that much horz~ yah, i'll be able to manage. as i told feng - i always had.
~~~ Angela 11:34 AM
Wednesday, October 13, 2004
Insanity test
~~~ Angela 4:42 PM
My Acronym
| A | Amorous |
| N | Naughty |
| G | Goofy |
| E | Easy |
| L | Legendary |
| A | Astonishing |
~~~ Angela 4:39 PM
Personality Cocktail
| How to make a Angela |
Ingredients:
1 part jealousy
3 parts courage
3 parts beauty |
Method:
Stir together in a glass tumbler with a salted rim. Top it off with a sprinkle of curiosity and enjoy! |
~~~ Angela 4:32 PM
Monday, October 11, 2004
Dr Mahathir & Car Shopping - short of $90K
went to work early this morn. white formal top, black pleated skirt, court shoes. even wore stockings, but that didn't stop blisters forming on both my little toes by the time i was walking along citylink. sigh, shld really start investing in a more decent pair of working-shoes.
ushering is a no-brainer. easy money, 'cept for the blisters. i was stationed on the 6th lvl, the left escalator n lift where all the VIPs will be coming from. n it juz so happened that the washrooms were oso there. anyway, i absolutely haf no idea y pple like to tok to me. as in, complete strangers.
1st guy trying to be funny: "why did they station a pretty young lady to guard the gents?" haha! so ridiculous, but he seemed nice n frenly so i grinned back.
some ah-mas (VIPs), with the oh-dear!-look:"since wat time have u been standing here??" "8.30" ah-mas: so-poor-thing-look
this guy who was almost running late, stared at me: "REGISTRATION?!!" "over there..." i pointed. "btw, do u know where i can top up my cash card?... u wldn't know rite?" "err... yah, sorry i dunno." gosh....
then there were the males, after registration, coming over n asking, "gents here rite?" "yah..." - haiyohz, fei4 hua4! the sign so clear.
1 particular man, whom i think is quite cool, coz he was wearing a dark blue formal shirt, but Harley Davidson designs were printed on the back, came up to tok to me after using the loo. asked me abt how i liked smu, the exchange programme, blah.
seriously, i find it weird that pple will tok to me so spontaneously. maybe i look approachable?? hmm....
sat in to listen to mahathir.... was like only an arms' length away from him as he walked past me into the hall - not really v exciting la. he is a rather amusing n entertaining person. he toks bluntly n doesn't seem to be afraid to offend ppl. it was interesting, n i'm sure the crowd has the same sentiments as me.
on the way home, i was so tempted to walk into topshop to shop... but i convinced myself that i'm gg CAR-shopping - topshop is nothing. ha!
think this is gonna be embarassing. but i'm gonna say it anyway... i fell in love w the first car i saw, which was the Mitsubishi Colt. haha! i nv once imagined tt i'll like a mitsubishi..... its not a fantastic car, but the interior was so elegant n pretty n spacious! wahz~~ i'm not too sure how its engine fairs, but the gear is like attached to the steering wheel (juz like old times), n the hand brake is an additional foot brake - dun really like that. honda jazz, toyota corolla, mazda2, nissan march - not really amazing altho the march elegance is real cute. =)
sigh, still want my volkswagen beetle badly. but first i need 90K....... =(
~~~ Angela 9:14 PM
~Aladdin~ n after-tots...
YAY!!! i've added another disney classic to my collection - Aladdin!!!! hahah! am so happy. juz watched it too - one of my all time favourites, esp the song! n princess jasmine is like soooo gorgeous. aladdin is so shuai too! n the king, altho useless, is so round n lovable! ahhhh....... okie, anyway.
really, watching cartoons n anime, i feel, is bad for my health. coz i always get sucked into the fantasy so much that i detest coming outta it. why is reality n life always so tough n hard n cruel? sigh.... i guess that's y we need fantasy, in order to escape for awhile.
i juz wanna sit on a magic carpet n fly away with my prince who will show me the world!!!........
but then again, the world, as it is in its true form, is not wat i wanna see.
~~~ Angela 1:04 AM
Sunday, October 10, 2004
Expensive lunch
Jeremy treated me to lunch today. he splurged more than a 100bucks on it. gee, i was too embarassed to try to pay him back coz i din even haf half of that amt in my wallet. oh well, juz graciously accepted the treat n made a mental note to treat him the nxt time round i see him. i thanked him and he said "don't worry abt it. its nothing." hahahhaha! - ok, nvm. private joke.
altho for only abt 2hrs, it was an enjoyable time together w a very dear childhood fren. toking abt his experiences in china, abt maji, abt old times... and gays... haha! great to see someone so full of zest n hope for the future =)
~~~ Angela 11:47 PM
Thursday, October 07, 2004
Back from retreat
it wasn't like the last, which was revitalising n rather fun. sigh. didn't slp well at all. didn't feel secure in that place i guess.... coz there were so many lizards. there was 1 in hsuyu's toilet the v 1st day...... anyway, so i kept waking up in the middle of the nite, look ard to make sure that everything's fine... kept hearing lotsa sounds...
we only had 1 outdoor low elements activity on the 1st afternoon. others were all indoor. well.... i prefer the outdoors stuff... more fun. guess the director had other ideas. esp w dirty jokes. yucks! watever. (sidenote: he hugged me twice coz i was standing nxt to him during this game. fengge wasn't v happy abt that)
a fren (who was staying a room away from mine) stumbled upon a frog in her toilet the 3rd morn. but it disappeared after her screams... anyway, after lunch, she found it in one of the cupboard drawers, n they managed to chase it outta the room. hahaha! i asked her how come she didn't kiss the frog? coz it was like all so fated. the frog in her room of all others. she saw it 1st, b4 her roomie. she found it in the drawers.... could really be her prince. haha!
swam on both the 1st n 2nd evenings. the pool wasn't exactly v clean... but oh well, the whole resort izzant. enjoyed myself more the 1st time, coz the waterjets were on, so i sat myself beneath them - some sort of jacuzzi. =) then i spent more time w myself too... juz swimming away from my frens, floating in the pool, looking up at the blueblue sky, n occasional birds flying across, singing songs of praise n thanking God for the simple beauty of things we always tend to overlook.
think i enjoyed the ferry ride back the most. not coz of the fact i was returning - i always dislike returning to reality - but coz i was on the deck the entire ride. =) took pics with frens, sat at the front part of the ferry (gee, wat izzit called huh?)......... the strong wind in my face..... the sun on my skin (it wasn't scorching, so it was juz nice)....... the waves beneath me...... the occasional splash of water on our faces........ the salty sea air..... the very defined horizon in the distance...... wahz~
the retreat set me thinking... on a v fundamental question that surprisingly nv crossed my mind previously. Why am i in the move to the new campus committee, when i so totally don't wanna move???
sigh. actually, think i know the ans. n i'm not v proud of it.
~~~ Angela 11:56 PM
Sunday, October 03, 2004
baffled? perplexed? perturbed? disconcerted? - juz confused.
i'm confused. actually i think i'm perpetually confused. think it'll be worse if i didn't know jesus. the point is, i hate being confused, uncertain. esp wrt to matters of the heart. but then again when can u ever be sure about such stuff??
if u're thinking that smthg must be wrong btw me n fengge.... don't worry. we're fine. it's juz me.
maybe the 3day retreat will be a good time for me to focus on other things, yet at the same time, haf some time (hopefully) to sort out my own tots.
~~~ Angela 11:59 PM
Lil twin stars lantern
Little Twin Stars!!! did i ever mentioned i like them? well, i do! n fengge bought me a pink lil twin stars lantern!!! =) (go see pix at my gallery!)
i wanted to hold lantern on MAF, but din get the chance to.... the lanterns they were selling then were so lan4 anyway. he knew i like holding lanterns.... gee, i even got my grandma to buy me a Marlin (Nemo's father), inflated w music latern for last yr's zhongqiujie, n its still hanging by my window.
anyway, so we went to the playgrd nearby my place to hold the lanterns, gaze at the oredi-not-so-round moon and walk ard. haha! me w my lil twin stars, n he w a red hello kitty one (his hello kitty looked v ugly). haha! think we looked q dumb since zhongqiu was oredi over. but knowing me, u'll know that alotta times i cant be bothered w other pple's gazes or wat they think. =p it was fun since i haven held lanterns for ages........ despite enjoying it so much. =)
~~~ Angela 10:59 PM
