Sunday, August 12, 2012
28岁的单身幸福
it is now august. think its the first time since i started blogging in '04 that i missed a birthday entry. well, bloggin certianly takes effort and time. n with all that's gg on in life, i'm just too lazy and other things take priority. nonetheless, i do recognise that my memories fade faster now and blogging abt certain thoughts and important events helps with recollection and also future retrospection.
i spent my 28th birthday with the love of my life - mummy. brunch at prive, keppel bay, shopping at vivo and ended off with a delicately sweet strawberry shortcake. she asked: 你今天开心吗？ i replied: 当然啦！我跟最爱我、最了解我的人在一起一整天，做我喜欢的事，怎么会不开心、不幸福呢？ it was only after replying that i realised the truth in wat i just said. its not that i was lying to mum. not at all! but sometimes u just reply wat comes to mind and only slightly later u weigh ur words... n i realised i was truly happy and 幸福.
i dont need a man to make me happy. i think i am more 幸福 with my mum. that's why my greatest fear is still to lose my mum one day bcoz i know i'll be so extremely lonely then. no one can ever replace her in my heart.
lately, i'm getting more confident that my singlehood days will end soon. (altho i'm still reluctant even to crystalise this thought here for fear that i am wrong.) don't get me wrong, there is no potential guy whom i'm dating or have gotten to know. no one, zilch. yet, i seem to know he'll appear soon. therefore, i'm really treasuring my singlehood now, even to a certain extent, unwilling to let go of this freedom. haha. i have really begun to see how singlehood is a gift and such a precious time when i can do so many things for God, and sadly i've taken so long to realise and smell the roses, or rather, jasmines which i prefer.
govan has moved on and is happily attached to a pretty girl living in the same town, same country. he has made their pic his profile pic. well, of coz i am bothered. in fact, i am upset. n i wished i could just blk him on fb but it's just not me n i believe with God's strength, i can overcome this. i was asking God, why do all my ex-bfs get attached so quickly with new chicks after our breakups? why does this same God, who loves me too, let them find their new love so soon? 难道神对我的爱不比他们多？NO. i refuse to believe the lies satan tries to mess me up with. Everyone has their unique paths to walk. God has his purposes for me, i am very sure :) now, i rest n enjoy my singlehood. Prayed a prayer of blessing for them, n continue with life, with work, with church, with chores, with family, with friendships and all that.
~~~ Angela 12:11 AM
